Ghost Bridegroom — Chapter 1

Chapter 1: Their bond began from a tree kabedon.

Ever since ancient times, the jianghu¹ consisted of the righteous and evil factions. 

A thousand years ago, the Demon Lord and the Spiritual Beast King had appeared one after the other. This resulted in a rampage of evil spirits and big beasts, turning the mortal realm into a purgatory. 

In those times, it had been challenging for immortal cultivators to survive. Their only choice was to form an alliance, to make a final stand and fight. 

However, even then, as there had been a disparity between their cultivation and strength, the immortal cultivators were beaten down by the demonic way. 

Ultimately, they could only hide away deep in the old forest, struggling on while at death’s door.

But fortunes can rise and fall, for change is the only constant. Just when the world was undergoing this calamity, the saviour of the immortal way appeared. 

The Sword Immortal descended into the mortal realm to behead the Spiritual Beast King, while the Profound Sect eliminated the Demon Lord to save the world. Without a leader, the spiritual beast clan and the strongest demonic cultivators were all killed by the Profound Sect’s founder.

The demonic way was quickly suppressed by the Heavenly Alliance headed by the Profound Sect. From henceforth, they entered a desolate slump that lasted several hundred years. Even to this day, it didn’t seem like their situation will improve.

The demonic cultivators endured this for a long time. Finally, they managed to wait until the senior-apprentice brother of Profound Sect betrayed his Master and entered the demonic way. 

Not long after, this person became the Palace of Bliss’ Master, He Huan. With his strong cultivation, he led the demonic way to resist the Heavenly Alliance.

Just when the demonic cultivators thought it was finally the day they could rise above their predicament, this He Huan got hacked by lightning during his calamity and managed to obtain extreme enlightenment……before returning to the Profound Sect. 

No one expected you could casually change between the righteous and evil factions at will. Just like this, the demonic way looked on helplessly as they watched their own boss get swindled away to the righteous way. A crowd of demonic cultivators suddenly became babies without a papa, and thus collectively agreed to follow the former second Protector of the Palace of Bliss, You Jiang, to switch sites to Mobei. 

They could only temporarily flee from the righteous way’s cutting edge. The remaining thing they could do was cry piteously as they waited for the new demonic leader to arrive.

Ever since the founder of Profound Sect distributed the cultivation manuals around the world, the cultivators’ strength could be classified with 5 levels: Forged Body, Foundation Establishment, Golden Core, Nascent Soul, and Post-Calamity.

Upgrading from Nascent Soul to Post-Calamity is a pivotal process where your immortal heart received the ultimate trial from the heavens. Once you survived this event, ascending was only a question of time.

In every generation, talented people would appear and lead the world for a few hundred years. It has already been forty years since He Huan returned to Profound Sect. From what the demonic cultivators know, the immortal way has already produced three cultivators at the Post-Calamity level. They have even heard that the Sect Leader of Profound Sect’s littlest disciple has already gone into seclusion to prepare for his calamity. 

However, their demonic way still didn’t have even a single Post-Calamity cultivator. 

The He Huan they once had got swindled away by the goddamned Profound Sect, this unbalanced the two factions. It really violated natural order and the harmony between yin and yang. 

Thus, the heavens will surely send them a demonic genius soon, who could save their feeble demonic way! 

So everyday, the demonic cultivators would burn three tall sticks of incense to pray that the old cultivator and Thousand Sword Killer He Huan from the Profound Sect will quickly ascend. On the other hand, they would stare attentively at the geniuses from their own demonic faction, vowing to gather all their strength to produce another Demon Lord.

The demonic cultivators thought, the leader of the demonic path right now, You Jiang, was also a betrayer of the righteous way. Although he was currently persisting on the frontlines to revive the demonic way, what if he also decided to return to the righteous way after getting fried by lightning during his calamity?

Thus, He Huan’s disciple Bi Qianren, the former major Protector of the Palace of Bliss and the current Protector of the entire demonic way, became the demonic cultivators’ best candidate for their next boss. 

In their perspective, first of all, Bi Qianren grew up in the demonic Palace of Bliss ever since he was young. His three views and morals couldn’t be righteous, so he wouldn’t run off to the righteous way one day to save the common people. 

Secondly, after his Master He Huan left, he insisted on staying in the demonic way to manage affairs. It was obvious he was a proper demonic cultivator who wasn’t bound by his feelings to his parental figure. 

The most important point, however, was that Bi Qianran was currently a Nascent Soul cultivator. His demonic heart has always been extremely stable, and he was but a mere step away from reaching Post-Calamity. His chances of passing were also extremely high.

In short, look at Bi Qianren’s indifference (to the point he’s completely expressionless), and then look at his gaze (that appears as if he despises everyone), this guy was practically born to be the demonic way’s leader ah!

Look, their Protector was once again using a gaze full of killing intent to look at his subordinates. So cold! So expressionless! So……!

Just when the demonic way’s Elder was observing his major Protector with gratification, using an expression brimming with hope for the demonic way’s radiant future, one of the branch masters of the demonic way standing beside him finally couldn’t bear it any longer. 

He spoke to interrupt the Elder’s beautiful fantasy, “Elder, the disciples from the Palace of Bliss said that their Protector has already been mingling in the demonic way for sixty years, but he still hasn’t found his double cultivation Daoist companion. There’s an eighty-percent chance he’s impotent ah!”

It wasn’t a secret that to this day, their major Protector was still a virgin. However, this little flaw was completely not enough to block the Elder’s love for Qianren. 

He stroked his snow-white beard and sighed, “Being impotent is good ah! If he can’t engage in the human way, then he wouldn’t be abducted by some righteous female cultivator. He is practically the perfect candidate for the next Demon Lord!”

“But the disciples from the Palace of Bliss don’t care about their partner’s gender ah.”

The branch master, whom the disciples from the Palace of Bliss had already successfully imparted some strange wisdom, continued to question. He very wisely pointed out that the danger wasn’t necessarily just righteous female cultivators, but also righteous male cultivators.

Hearing this, the Elder was finally angered. With a single fist, he sent this wordy subordinate flying, before resolutely defending the major Protector’s dignity. 

“Shut up, don’t jinx it! From head to toe, does the Protector look gay at all?! Have you ever seen such an imposing, soldierly broken sleeve before? And even if he is gay, he definitely won’t be the one on the bottom!”

Although the Nascent Soul Elder was already over a hundred years old, whenever he spoke, he still sounded like a giant booming bell. Thus, his tone of voice during his claim—of how Qianren would stay single for his entire life—also sounded extremely touching. 

However, as the protagonist they were discussing, the demonic way’s major Protector Qianren immediately snapped the pen he was using to mark up his documents, before giving that old man a death glare.

In the demonic way, there were two ways to mock someone. 

The first; even a disciple from the Palace of Bliss doesn’t want to top you, the second; someone like you will stay a virgin even if you fell into the Palace of Bliss.

Let’s temporarily not talk about how scary the Palace of Bliss’ existence was. More importantly, as the former major Protector of the Palace of Bliss, Qianren very unluckily became the living example of the prior two taunts. 

After so many decades, he had even obtained the honorable title of being the demonic way’s least sexy male cultivator.

Bi Qianren could ignore how these two threw all of the demonic way’s work onto him and began chatting leisurely on their own. 

However, they even dared to pry open the scars in his heart. 

Enough was enough! 

Qianren decided to no longer endure this, and immediately said with indifference, “In order to pass my calamity soon, I’ve decided to follow my Master’s instructions to travel the jianghu. The affairs of the demonic way will be handed over to you.” 

The moment he heard this, the Elder became stupefied. He had never expected that they would lose the old ox taking on half of the demonic way’s affairs just like this. 

Cough cough, no wait, it was the major Protector who would save the demonic way from their tribulation. 

The Elder said with sorrow, “Major Protector, the demonic way can only be revitalized with you leading. This huge responsibility was dictated by God, you can’t leave ah!” 

However, in response, their indifferent Protector only said a single truth. “Are you stupid? Which demonic cultivator will take up such a big responsibility?”

Bi Qianren’s words made a lot of sense, so the Elder was immediately left speechless. He could only look on helplessly as their major Protector casually flew away with ease. 

Then, after taking a look at the desk full of documents and wiping his tears, the Elder mentally sighed: Sure enough, their major Protector made the best demonic cultivator. Even his unruly, rash behaviour completely suited a demon’s criteria.

What’s written above is precisely how the demonic way’s major Protector Bi Qianren managed to run away from home—No, I mean, how he began travelling around the world. 

Recalling the casual and willful way he had left, and then taking a look at his current, tragic circumstances (as he needed to spend a night in the burial mounds), Qianren could only silently hold his forehead. 

He shouldn’t have cared about how returning to pack his bags after his dramatic exit would damage his image. Even if he was a Nascent Soul expert, living in a hotel still required money ah! 

Even if Bi Qianren was a demonic cultivator, with his dumpling skin-thin face, he still couldn’t do something as scoundrelly as living in a hotel without paying. 

Luckily, he used to be the number one hitman under the heavens. Although he hadn’t taken up any missions after he became the demonic way’s Protector, resuming his old trade now wouldn’t be too hard.

After his Master He Huan heard this news, he roused his disciples without the slightest hesitation to make them fly over and give Bi Qianren his first job—help the Profound Sect find an outer-sect disciple who had disappeared for ten years. 

In addition, since it was convenient, help him buy a sweet hawthorn cake, the local specialty of Zhu family living in the area, and send it back to him via flying sword.

Although he was very skeptical whether his old, improper Master cared more about the specialty cake or the missing outer-sect disciple, the Bi Qianren who highly respected his Master still stepped onto the path to find a missing person. Following the information given by his Master, he found a small village concealed within the tall mountains. 

And then, because of his strange reason to not pack his bags, Bi Qianren set up camp on the outskirts of the town. 

This kind of place, one that was cut off from the outside world, was always desolate. Since few cultivators passed through, it became the place where puny, weak supernatural beings loved occupying. 

The whole way here, Qianren hadn’t encountered a single villager. Instead, he had to take care of numerous demons and ghosts. 

Unfortunately, anything hiding from cultivators here were mostly nameless wandering souls or small demons. Even if you tried selling them in the black market, you wouldn’t get much money. This only made the Mister Hitman who had forgotten his wallet before leaving home feel even more depressed.

As someone whose appearance and temperament both suited a demonic cultivator, Qianren wasn’t the least scared as he rested in this burial mounds. He lifted his foot, and then stepped onto the white bone that had just struggled to climb out of the dirt. 

Next, Bi Qianren lifted his head and coldly stated to the ghosts who were shivering behind gravestones, “I’m in a very bad mood right now. If you guys don’t want your souls scattered, it’s best if you stay obediently in the ground.”

Just this mere sentence made all the ghosts squirm into the dirt and back into their corpses. Even the bones from the graves that were dug up by others, who didn’t know where they could hide, very conscientiously grabbed some dirt to scatter on their own skulls to pretend they were already buried.

Precisely during this tragic scene where the ghosts were bullied by the scary demonic cultivator, a brave warrior crawled out from the thicket.

It wore a robe that was as red as blood, and its messy, long hair hid its entire face. Pale fingers dug into the ground as it moved out from the weeds with difficulty. Every time it moved, one could hear the distinct sound of rattling bones. 

Taking a mere look at the green ghostly fires that kept lighting up in the air, one would know that this person was completely not on the same level as the rest of the ghosts here. In the very least, it had to be a malicious ghost.

When he saw how this malicious ghost began approaching him, Qianren’s complexion immediately blackened. As expected, this ghost crawled over to his feet, before an extremely muddy hand firmly grabbed onto his boots. 

Blood-red eyes peered out from messy long hair, before it spoke sorrowfully, “Wife……I came to find you……” 

With just this sentence, Qianren finally became unable to restrain the impulse in his heart. He lifted his foot and immediately stepped onto this blind ghost, pinning him to the tree so he couldn’t move, before violently yelling, “I’ll say this one last time, I’m not your wife!”

Yes. Bi Qianren, Post-Calamity Devil He Huan’s only disciple, the demonic way’s most promising young talent with the highest chances of becoming the next Demon Lord, the number one hitman under the heavens literally everyone avoids……actually got harassed by a malicious spirit in the middle of his mission! 

More importantly, it was actually a stupid ghost who couldn’t tell the difference between men and women, and who would call whoever it captured their wife!

1. For more information about the jianghu, check: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wuxia#Jianghu